Four: College Tips (07-12-2022)
College, for me, was never a choice. I was destined to be a college student from the second I began receiving high marks in elementary school, but by the time I'd arrived on campus, I faced an unprecedented challenge in my academic career: the need to put in effort. It took me three years to go from failing multiple classes to making Dean's List, a difficult journey after 12 years of primary schooling without ever studying once. Those three years taught me many valuable lessons about how to succeed and how to orient myself such that success is inevitable and motivation produces itself. Many people dishing out advice for students online lack the perspective of ever once struggling, rather being lifelong success stories seeing an in to manipulate and exploit those who are struggling. So take if from me, someone who did struggle and did turn around, that the following advice will produce positive results in your academic journey.
The first piece of advice I received was in high school, long before going to college, and formed the basis for the habits that I developed later. Everyday, regardless of activity, wear real pants. Jeans or casual khakis work, but even better are work pants like Carhartts, or real jeans, the kind with double knees and a hammer loop, not the Flex-Special fake-fading American Eagle shopping mall kind. Putting on real pants that scratch, itch, and take time to break in will immediately set you into a work mode, and from the moment those pants go on and the balls start sweating, productivity begins. Once the pants come off, relaxation is unavoidable as comfort returns, but this work-leisure balance is better employed in conjunction with a physical element.
Next- buy nice work boots and wear them. This advice follows from the previous, and has all the same benefits. Additionally, a single $350 pair of Red Wing boots will last through 4 years of college better than 4-5 pairs of $160 Nikes, and if sized and broken in properly, will be just as comfortable.
Third, and this advice is better tuned for students going to schools in urban or high crime areas, buy a cheap, dirty car, or damage your existing car such that no one will want to go near it. This will prevent carjacking, robbery, and clingy roommates or girlfriends trying to mooch rides. A potential negative side effect of driving a disgusting vehicle may be attracting opportunistic catalytic converter thieves, but a couple razors and duct tape in various spots on the undercarriage will properly deter any desperate junkies or hungry homeless with a hacksaw.
A fourth piece of advice, general and standard advice, is to get up early. An 8 am class usually spells doom for college students, but if you're used to getting up at 5 or 6 in the morning, getting a cold shower, donning your boots and britches, then an 8 am is hardly a small part of a productive morning. I've been getting up at 5 am for a long time now, and although it still means copious quantities of coffee to get through to noon, it's well worth it for an extra few hours of time to myself on a slow day or to work on a busy day.
At this point, if you've been carefully following the preceding advice, you'll already see significant improvement to your test scores, social life, and productivity such that you have more free time than ever despite performing better than your peers who do not. All of this without needing to do semen retention, perineum sunning, or rigorous fitness routines like most advice gurus online will have you believe is a bare minimum prerequisite to personal success. The following advice is non-standard, and represents the most difficult transition in my personal journey, as at this point the most progress has already been achieved. With rugged pants and boots, a cruddy car, and a carpe mane attitude, you're 95% of the way to the level of work ethic befitting a billionaire or other kind of rich person. The last 5% requires a passion for performance that is unrivaled, and that can be surprisingly accomplished with only a few minor changes to your behavior.
First non-standard advice: listen to reggaeton during work hours, and salsa on non-work hours. Reggaeton's rhythm and repetition allows your brain to achieve a groove when working, and its Spanish lyrics (presuming you're not fluent) won't distract from your work. Add to its mental aptitude improving qualities the simple fact that it's good music, and you'll be surprised how it boosts your mood throughout the day. Salsa on off hours is a recommendation to extenuate the productive atmosphere from the day into the night while maintaining the work to relaxation dichotomy created by changing out of work boots and work pants.
Second non-standard advice: get rid of your backpack. Most college students carry their laptops and textbooks and assorted stationery in their security-blanket-pack, but most college students aren't in the top 1% of students. A good replacement for a boring North Face or Jansport is a standard toolbag, with Carhartt being a good budget-friendly source for this as well as work pants. This bag comes predivided, good for the organized among us, and reinforced enough to last through 4 years of classes. A great replacement would be a 5-gallon bucket, widely available at any hardware store like Home Depot, Lowe's, or Ace. The lack of divisions requires the user to parse down their daily carry and keep careful track of how they organize their belongings, a useful quality in a successful student. Additionally, since the bucket is hard plastic, it's unlikely to fail from regular use.
The third piece of non-standard advice is actually an extension of relatively common advice: get a job. Working during college is a requirement for some, but for many, it is an unthinkable distraction from schoolwork. If you've made it this far, you know that you have more than enough time to work a few hours, with most of your work done in the mornings and your drive for success pushing you to fill any remaining time with productive activity. Good jobs for college students are usually easy to come by on campus, part-time gigs at the library or a fast food place work great for most students. Better than these standard, mindless jobs would be getting a job in the trades, but with limited time due to a full course load, all that you'll probably have time for is day laboring, but this is all you're probably qualified for anyway. Spending a couple hours a week plus Saturday and Sunday hanging around Home Depot looking for work laying bricks or framing walls will quickly become a solid gig, with the added benefit of being under the table. Careful though- your coworkers may trick you into learning Spanish, which would lesson the usefulness of your reggaeton workflow, but this can be avoided by keeping a small confederate flag sticker on your already horrendous car.
By making use of all of the previous pieces of advice, you'll be the top performing student in your cohort. You'll be making money, earning high grades, and without even realizing it, securing a job for yourself after college that won't be destroyed by a dwindling economy. The amount of unintended benefits of this program of lifestyle changes is too numerous to include here, but you'll quickly notice the spiciness and flavor profile of food improving, your Catholic faith being restored, and a nice tan that never goes away.